Just Say No to Crocs

I'm not sure where this "trend" came from or why people think it is fashionable, but Crocs are by far the worst footwear a person can choose to sport. My mom owns a pair, and if that isn't reason enough for everyone to stop wearing them, the fact that they are absolutely, completely fugly should be. My mother is also diabetic and they make Crocs that are comfortable for those who suffer from neuropathy of the feet. So she has an excuse. I'm not sure I think diabetes is enough reason to wear these things, but I'll let her slide, she is my mother after all.

However, if you are not my mother, you should not ever be seen wearing these shoes. Okay fine, if you have a pool or you're going to a beach, I can maybe see the draw these shoes have. However, you can just buy flip flops or something. Crocs are just simply too ugly for public.

A coworker just received a pair in the mail. In green. Bright green. I nearly lost my shit when I saw her walk by and she waved them at me, smiling her sadistic smile, taunting me with ugly footwear. She knows I loathe Crocs and she knows how to push my buttons.

Please...people. Just say no to Crocs. There are alternative forms of footwear that don't violate decency laws or nauseate those of us who are forced to see these clunky, fugly shoes on your feet. Isn't the world already going through enough? Think of the war torn countries in the Middle East. Do you really want to add to that misery by wearing your Crocs in public? Or ever? I didn't think so.

Oh and don't try burning them, it's best to just bury them in the backyard. I hear they are chemically coated to keep your feet from getting funky (is that not reason enough to not wear these shoes) and I would hate for someone to burn their neighborhood down trying to destroy the abomination that is the Croc.

Thank you for listening!